A week tomorrow it will be my best friend’s wedding where I will be a bridesmaid.
I am stressed to the max about it.
I have bad hair that hasn’t had a cut since January.
I have bad skin that makes me look like a red avocado.
I do not have a pair of tights to wear.
I have ill fitting or unsuitable jackets, and I would be more stressed if it wasn’t for the fact I have the dress and shoes already bought and arranged by the bride.
As I have been a mental f*** up at pretty much every big scale social event since 2015 I am scared that I am going to ‘ruin’ the wedding.
I have told you about how my Dad and Step Mum (to be) are effectively eloping.
I told the boy this week that if we were going to get married sooner rather than later my anxiety could not cope with anything more than a couple of witnesses in attendance. I would love to marry the boy. I would love to have a big day surrounded by my loved ones, but I know me, I know I would ruin it.
I really hope I don’t do anything bad.