I am pleased to report that today was a ‘No Spend Day’ (NSD) meaning so far this year 1/3 of the days have not involved any money leaving my wallet.
Yes the year is only three days old but I will take victories where I can.
In December I think the weight of 2016 had finally gotten to me because I was buying a big fat sugary latte coffee (despite being more of an americano kinda girl) at least once a day in order to just get through the day with at least one eye open.
But that can happen no more, so it was goodbye Java Mermaid and hello supermarket own brand gold roast instant coffee. I do like a nice ground coffee but am perfectly happy with instant, I know to some that is a sin but I don’t really have very discerning taste buds.
It was so frosty this morning, and so cold, and so dark at 6am that I was a bit like ‘Up with this I will not put!’ but there are far bigger problems in the world.
We do need more milk, but I think we can live without replacing it until tomorrow. I am desperate for as many NSDs as I can get.
In 2016 I achieved 71 NSDs.
In 2017 I want to achieve double that.
Some may wonder, what’s the big deal about a NSD? Why go out of your way to have X amount of NSDs when all that matters is that you stay in your budget?
I agree, to a certain extent. The trouble is I know myself, or at least the old self. I could barely go more than half a day without spending my money on something. It didn’t matter what it was.
I am the sort of person for whom money really does burn a hole in my pocket.
I remember when I was a 12 year old girl and was going shopping in town with my friends (no parents, woo hoo!) I would spend all my pocket money there and then, and if I had 50p left, then I would find for something, ANYTHING, that was 50p just to buy it and to have more more things.
I remember my friend had to stop me buying a 15p shampoo that had the look of washing up liquid just in order to use up my last pennies.
My problem is shopping gives me a high, and ok my tastes are cheap, think Peacocks not Prada, but debt is still debt whether it came from haute couture or the high street.
This may seem like a big revelation, but actually I have known for a long time that I am on the hunt for something that will make my life better. I am on the hunt for essentially a magic wand or a genie lantern.
What is wrong with my life? What do I have to complain about?
My life is pretty blessed, but I do have mental health problems, hormone problems, anxiety problems and low self esteem. Aye aye aye.
I was after a magical product that would cure my problems. Dealing with them head on in a mature and reasonable fashion would be too simple and sensible for the old Flo. Instead I tried to buy happiness. I had a hole in my heart that needed to be plugged with something shiny.
So when I did go shopping I couldn’t stick to a list. Oh I would make a list, but I would add to it. I couldn’t just buy the loaf of bread and milk that we needed, I would hunt high and low until I left the shop with the baking supplies, herbal teas and wonder products just to buy some lifestyle I was hoping to emulate.
I don’t really have the confidence to be me. To say and believe that I am fine the way I am. I seem to be trying to find someone else’s idea of perfection in the shops.
What I’m hoping this year is to cut to the very core of who I am and rid my life of ‘clutter’ whether it is in terms of clothes, physical items or mental clutter.
NSDs do me good. They make me realise I can live without buying crap.
Just 141 more NSDs to go.